Growing up as a young person is not easy. That is as much as I have learnt so far. I am 21, brought up by middle class parents in a large family of six, four boys and two girls, being the fifth born.
My young life has been characterized by feats of victory, and I am happy to have made people who care about me proud, especially my parents. I am blessed to have been brought up to a promising young man.
The problem with being seen as a promising young man is that people around you begin to think you can face it on your own. Therefore, they thrust you into the arena and let you fight out alone. Sometimes they may withhold advice that you need simply because they think you have it all figured out, when actually you don’t.
I have been in the dark more times than I can remember. I have cried and sobbed from inside yet at the same time forcing a smile and peaceful confidence on the outside. On several occasions I have literally reached my breaking point and decided to quit, especially on school; by whatever miracle am still braving on, I do not know.
Some people are described as being tough on the inside but soft spoken on the inside, and they are applauded for their grit. I think on most times I am tough on the outside and naturally soft on the inside; and I have to make it in order to protect my outer toughness.
Do you ever feel that you are destined for something great, like there is a huge chapter of your life awaiting you? You may be at the deepest point of your life, but that nagging that a great destiny is ahead still knocks at your heart? You feel done, down and out, yet inside of you he confidence still stands. That’s how I feel sometimes.
It’s a difficult time. Questioning all the things you were told, separating the facts from the prejudices, trying to carve your path different from the one that was set out for you. It makes you feel inadequate at times, yet it is also fulfilling.
Making those grave mistakes of young adulthood that you never want to remember. Learning to live with people, getting friends and losing some. Trying to reconcile your new found worldview with your parents’ advices. Living a different millennium under the guidance of a previous one. It can tear one apart because its sometimes frustrating.
Sometimes you wonder, why am I different? Why am I not like them? Well, the fact that you ask that in the first place is evidence that you are going to get it figured out, sooner or later. And figuring it out is the last personal struggle you will have to deal with before you get on the highroad.
You know, someone just wants to be remembered. To live a long, full life. Mandela said it’s not about the number of years in your life, but the life in your years that counts. Others before us have done it. So can you and I.
Just make the right decisions today. Have hope and faith and keep moving forward. It doesn’t matter how slow you move, as long as you do not stop.